Monday, September 20, 2010

From the Files of Isis Champion :: Firsts

"My first real "first date" was not what I had hoped it would be. I wasn't able to attend...I wasn't even aware I had been invited!

The year was 2004 (late bloomer ;) ) and Physics classmate Jimmy Lincoln approached me to ask if I would like to get together for dinner and a movie. The only problem was that he didn't ask me...he asked my evil doppelganger Antith-Isis (another first - my first run-in with that lunatic from another dimension.)

Apparently Antith-Isis had been running around pretending to be me for some time. I was getting blamed for all kinds of stupid things I didn't do - Painting the White House "off-white", carving Groucho glasses on Mount Rushmore (everyone but Teddy Roosevelt of course), removing shopping carts from entire chains of grocery stores world-wide and replacing them with other chains' shopping carts. Dumb things like that.

I just couldn't figure out exactly what was going on. Until Jimmy came up to me in class with pictures of "us" from one of those picture booths at the mall. He told me we were supposed to meet later that evening for an ice cream and to "give that 'ol Statue of Liberty right back to the French."

(Photo Source: Associated Press)

Here I am later that day giving Antith-Isis a piece of my mind...moments before she gives me a piece of her right hook. (First #3 - the first time I ever unintentionally orbited Saturn.)

She's saying something like "You talkin' to ME?!?!"

I hate when the bad-guys quote DeNiro."

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